A Christmas Gift Your Family Will Never Forget

It was Christmas Eve as Mark emerged from the office. Walking up to his new car, he noticed a street urchin circling with admiration.

“Is this your car Mister?” he asked.

Mark nodded, “My brother gave it to me as an early Christmas present.”

The boy look astounded. “You mean your brother gave it to you and it didn’t cost you anything? Gosh I wish…”

He hesitated and Mark knew what he was going to wish. He was going to wish that he had a brother like that. But the lad’s actual wish jarred Mark to his inner core.

“I wish,” the boy went on, “that I could be a brother like that.”

Mark looked at the boy in astonishment, then impulsively asked: “Would you like to ride in my car?”

“Oh yes, I’d love that!”

After a short ride the urchin turned and with his eyes aglow said, “Mister, would you mind driving in front of my house?”

Mark smiled and could guess what the lad really wanted. He wanted his neighbors to see him riding in a cool car. But Mark missed it again.

“Will you stop by those steps please?” as he pointed. The boy ran up the steps and into the house. A short while later, Mark heard him returning, but slowly. He was carrying his little polio-crippled brother. He sat down on the bottom step and embracing his brother, pointed to the car.

“There she is Mikey, just like I told you upstairs. His brother gave it to him for Christmas and it didn’t cost him a cent. Someday I’m gonna give you one just like it, then you can see for yourself all the pretty things in the Christmas windows and all the lights on the houses and trees that I’ve been trying to tell you about.”

Mark got out and lifted the tiny lad into the front seat of the car. The shiney-eyed older brother climbed in and the three of them began a memorable holiday ride.

That Christmas eve, Mark learned what Jesus meant when He said, “It is more blessed to give…”

To give the gift of neutral space with your loved ones, a space that is void of derision, judging, sarcasm, and manipulation. What an incredible gift to give your children or your spouse, a space that is shared that is so neutral it is safe and inviting, full of love.

Neutral space comes from God. It is the gift of giving safety and love. The gift of Christmas is removing judgment from our discussions and not assuming we know the answers.

It’s giving our spouse and our children permission to be human without ridicule or judgment. Assuming you know is judging and manipulative. Setting expectations for our loved ones is setting yourself up for frustration. When children know they can enter your space without fear of retribution, it’s like Christmas every day.

When your spouse realizes that she can enter your space without fear of physical or emotional pain, it’s the foundation for intimacy. The ultimate end result of marriage. For as the scripture teaches: “And this is life eternal, that they might KNOW thee, the only true God and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent.” (John 17:3)

May we know God by emulating His ability to create a loving, neutral space for us to dwell. The spirit of Christmas exists in the safety of being neutral toward our neighbor. Love is without malice and judging. Being neutral invites the Spirit.

Removing expectations and seeing your loved ones as children of God is truly the gift of Christmas.

Pick one person with whom you’ve had conflict in the past, like a sister-in-law, (a statistical guess) and focus on creating neutral space for her. Decorate that space in a manner becoming of a King or Queen and invite your guest of honor in for a royal but neutral treatment.

Christmas is the season for giving. May you each develop the sweet taste of giving away neutral space with your loved ones this Holiday Season.