Category: Family

Setting Goals For Others

If you have a goal for another person, you’ve made yourself a victim.

Salespeople, missionaries, church leaders, and parents are often found in frustrating positions because they have set goals, made plans, and formulated expectations for other people without the proper permission being granted.

When you set a goal for someone else, you violate his or her trust and expose yourself to disappointment. It is often a result of perceiving that you know what is best for the other person. In such cases, the achievement of said goal is more important to you than to the person.

Safe Sex: America’s Fastest Growing Religion

Finally a religion that Atheists and religionists can agree on.  The discrepancy is in their interpretation and this makes for a fascinating discussion.

From an atheist standpoint, science replaces God. As long as there is science, why do we need a God? Science can even provide a moral base, or so they argue.

Let’s take sex as our subject matter. Sex is the elephant standing in your living room full of guests that nobody will discuss. Safe sex is an oxymoron except within the bonds of matrimony.

Teaching vs. Criticizing

“I could just tell you what to do, or we could explore it together. The first is much faster to deliver. The second usually works better.” – Carl Ingalls

Teaching vs. Criticism

Teaching is the process of delegating thinking to the student.  The art of asking questions to teach has prerequisites and can only be applied when functioning within The You Pyramid™. The anti-thesis of teaching is criticizing.

Constructive criticism is the politically correct way of seeking agreement from or forcing agreement on someone else and masking it as a virtue.

Constructive tends to build up and to serve a useful purpose.

Dress Standards: An Outward Expression of our Inward Being

When I was young my dad was in the Marine Corps. When he took us on base, people walking by would snap off a crisp salute because of his dress. He carried a certain rank and with that rank came an expected behavior to the person who possessed that rank.

In our church, when the Bishop walks in a meeting, there is a certain respect accorded him because of his position. He dresses the part, 2 or 3 piece suit, a white shirt, and normally with a conservative tie.

Lot and Abraham: a contrast in priorities

Here is a letter I sent to Stuart who is serving as a missionary in the Spain, Malaga mission.

Dear Elder Himmer,

My greatest insight for today was during the 3rd hour at church. I was asked to teach a short lesson on avoiding temptation. So I studied the story of Abraham and Lot.

If you’ll remember, Lot and Abraham divided their wealth and Lot took the more fertile lands and Abraham was content with what was left over.

To Date With A Purpose

DWAP – Date With A Purpose
For the Single Person

1.    The purpose for dating is to narrow the field to one person that you determine is the best companion for Eternal Life.
a.    Make a list of the qualities you want in a spouse.  There is nothing off limits.  Don’t try to be overly spiritual, too philosophical, or lascivious.  Just be you.  I wanted a pretty wife her took care of herself (exercise and public appearance) so I married a pretty wife that loved exercise.  That was important too me, but so was a love for sports.  My wife knew nothing about sports when I met her.

The Birth of Abigail

An Evening with Estrogen

On June 13, 1984 my life changed forever. My lovely bride, Cheri, presented me with a son. This was before the day of ultra-sounds and i-pods. Back then, were we excited to hear the pitter-patter of a tiny heart beating. The doctors and specialists would listen and then caveat their opining with the ever careful; there is no proof, BUT…prologue.


Nowadays we not only get their gender but their attitude as well, for example: see how she’s tilting her head? Oh look at his hands, he’s a basketball player, boy the apple won’t fall far from this tree…and on it goes.

Seattle To Portland 2008

Seattle To Portland

2008

What a great ride we had this year. I can’t remember a ride that had so many variables, accidents, flat tires, chain derailments, heat, great people, rides, congestion, pain, etc. Our cast of heroes this year had a few additions, but it was our largest team, which also meant the most variables possible. Our team this year was:

From Manhatten, NY Bryant Blanchard

From Sacramento, CA Mark O’Guinn

From Seattle, WA Lisa Petersen

From Gig Harbor, WA Timothy Holmes, Kyle Gomm, Bradford Van Duker, Mark Van Duker, & me

Stuart to the MTC

Yesterday was a big day for the Himmer Family as we delivered Stuart into the MTC in Provo, UT. This is our 3rd son to serve a mission. He will spend 3 weeks in the Provo MTC learning Spanish and then fly to Madrid Spain where he will spend another 6 weeks in intensive study learning ‘Spain’ Spanish along with the concepts of Preach My Gospel. (He will return speaking Spanish with a lisp.)

We landed in Salt Lake on Tuesday and headed to Temple Square only to learn that the Temple was closed. So we picked up some things at the Distribution Center and ate lunch.

The Ice Cream Experience

Last night we conducted another edition of the ‘Ice Cream Experience’ in our home. For those of you unfamiliar with this term, it was originally called the Ice Cream Game, but participants felt the word game gave off the feeling of lightheartedness and frivolity, which is not part of the ‘Experience.’

The purpose of the ‘Experience’ is to own 100% of our communication. The ‘Experience’ teaches us how to own 11 different emotional spaces. This is a Marshall Thurber invention.

The ‘Experience’ is played with a conductor who directs the proceedings and is responsible for the interventions.

A Father’s Day Tribute

God The Father
Father’s Day 2008

I don’t remember the exact details, but this is what I’ve put together so far. The spirits were innumerable, but we all felt we had front row seats. The Father presented His plan, we would take on a mortal body, different from the spiritual one we currently have. We were all excited, but we didn’t know exactly what that meant.

He taught us that we would be in a fallen state, sin would be rampant and people would make poor choices that would directly and indirectly lead to a lot of suffering and pain. We learned that when we made a poor choice, He would allow the natural consequences to happen, which was another way of saying we would be punished for our own sins.

Issaquah Triathalon

Cheri in the transition area

This year we celebrated our 3rd Annual Issaquah Triathalon.

The team members are Brandi Clark (our Polynesian fish)

Jamie Gomm (our long legged Gazelle) &

Cheri (the Lance Armstrong of the team)

The girls wanted a PB this year. (PB stands for Personal Best and not Peanut Butter for those of you outside the vernacular of sports enthusiasts.)

Just before the start Jamie knew she was ready for a great performance. Her time trials were all better than the previous two years.

Cheri trained hard this year and after last year ride knew she could improve. (Last year Cheri had just returned from Israel and was sick on race day.)

Bowling, I remember when…

For Cheri’s birthday in July of last year, I performed less than stellar for my part and felt a need to make it up to her. So we had a Wah-half birthday party because she wah’d about her lack of a birthday and I felt very guilty. For the experience we put together some “I Remember When” stories. Here is one of my first memories of Cheri back in 1981 when we were just dating.

The picture is with Cheri in Salzburg.

I Remember When…
December 28, 2007
Cheri’s Wah-Birthday party

The Hope Island Adventure

The Himmer High Adventure
The Hope Island Saga
September 2006

And so it was, that after I had committed to my family that we would schedule our lives around family events instead of my work, we planned a kayak trip to Hope Island that would include all the human members of our family. These plans were set weeks in advance, yea, perhaps even months. Winston Churchill was fond of saying that the plan is insignificant compared to the planning; in fact, it’s all about the planning.