In life there are three truths we deal with:
Official Truth
Ground Truth
Underground Truth
The official truth is the truth that you discuss in public.
The ground truth is the truth that you discuss in private.
The underground truth is the truth that you ignore, avoid, and fear. This is reality that is often not seen until too late.
FINANCES
The official truth is that our finances are fine.
The ground truth is that we’re on the verge of losing our house and possibly filing bankruptcy.
The underground truth is that we don’t know how to discuss our finances, balance our checkbooks and keep a budget.
MARRIAGE
The official truth is that our marriage has never been better.
The ground truth is that our relationship has grown cold. We don’t argue because we don’t talk.
The underground truth is that we don’t know how to talk. Neither of us has ever learned how to trust or resolve conflict, so we fight over everything or we avoid the subject completely.
FAMILY
The official truth is that our kids are doing great.
The ground truth is that we have serious problems with our eldest and his sister is following the same pattern.
The underground truth is that we don’t know how to parent. Our kids don’t trust or respect us and we can’t get them to listen.
Does any of this sound or feel familiar?
Here is a full report explaining the Layers Of Communication in which we operate.
You can download the report here.
LOVED this part of the ‘Layers of Communication’ PDF:
Have you ever considered that nobody really cares? They are too busy with their own unspoken conversations and ground truths to put much stock into yours. AND if you’re
worried about the neighborhood gossip columnist who spends her time on the phone, you can take solace that the lava is knee deep in her home, else why does she need to tear others down in order to get a false and temporary feeling of satisfaction. Remember, gossiping is also an addiction and it is insatiable. It doesn’t make anybody happier.